The Power and Limits of Mental Models
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how we handle things that don’t quite fit with the way we see the world. We all have these mental models—those internal frameworks that guide how we act, think, and chase our goals. They’re like a map we draw for ourselves to make sense of life. But what happens when the map doesn’t match the ground we’re walking on? That’s where it gets tricky.
For me, it’s about congruence—everything has to line up with my mental model, or I feel off. Take this example: I’ve got this behaviour of mine, like getting angry at people when they don’t act the way I expect. In my head, I’ve built this model where I can’t succeed unless things are calm, predictable, and rational. But when someone throws a spanner in the works, I get cross—properly cross. It’s not just about losing my temper; it’s that outside my mental model, I feel like I can’t win. Everything has to fit, or it’s chaos.
When Mental Models Hold Us Back
The thing is, your mental model can also be limiting. How much are you capable of, really? I’m not talking about ego here—none of that “I’m the best” nonsense. What I mean is creating a vision, a personal framework to guide you towards your goals. But sometimes, that vision is smaller than you think you’re capable of. It’s like you’ve set a ceiling for yourself without even realising it. How do you know how far you can go? What are your potentialities? That’s the question I keep circling back to.
Let’s say you’ve got a mental model for success in a particular industry—education, for instance. Your framework might tell you, “Keep pushing, keep persisting, that’s how you make it.” But what if you’re not succeeding? You’re slogging away, and it’s just not working. Maybe the model’s telling you to stay the course, but deep down, you know you need to pivot—shift direction and create something different. That’s where it gets tough. Do you stick to the plan, or do you admit the plan’s not cutting it?
Letting Go of What Doesn’t Fit
Here’s what I’ve been mulling over: if you have a strong mental model, then anything that gets in the way—anything incongruent with that model—must be discarded. You have to let it go. It’s not easy, though. Whether it’s a behaviour (like my anger), an old goal, or even the model itself, letting go feels like losing a piece of yourself. But if it’s not working, what’s the point of holding on?
Think about that education example again. You’re pouring everything into it because your mental model says persistence is the key. But maybe success isn’t there—it’s somewhere else, in a new direction. Pivoting doesn’t mean giving up; it means seeing that what’s incongruent with your vision might be a sign to rethink the vision itself.
Finding the Balance
So how do you figure this out? A mental model gives you structure—it’s your compass. But if you cling to it too tightly, you might miss the bigger picture. I reckon it’s about testing it, like an experiment. If it’s not getting you where you want to be, tweak it. Or chuck it out and start fresh. Because here’s the thing: how do you know your potential if you’re stuck in a framework that’s too small?
I’m still working through this myself. It’s about knowing when to hold fast and when to loosen your grip. Sometimes, the stuff that doesn’t fit isn’t the problem—your model is. And that’s okay. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about growing.
Where to From Here?
Mental models are brilliant—they keep us grounded. But they’re not set in stone. I’m starting to see them as tools, not rules. If they’re not helping me reach my potential, then maybe it’s time to redraw the map. What about you? Where’s your mental model taking you—and what might you need to let go of to get there?
