This is an exclusive Q&A session with Mr. Sprinkle Box. He got his name from the Latin term for the Gauteng bullfrog (also known as the African bullfrog or giant bullfrog), Pyxicephalus adspersus. The genus Pyxicephalus refers to the “little box-head” or “box head” shape of the frog’s snout. The species name adspersus means “sprinkled” or “dotted,” referring to the characteristic dark spots on the frog’s skin.
We spoke to Mr. Sprinkle Box, Chief of the clan of Gauteng bullfrogs at the Braamfontein Spruit in Delta Park, Randburg.
CB (your interviewer): Excuse me, sir, could I ask you a few questions?
Mr. Sprinkle Box (SP): Why come and disturb me at breakfast time? Well, did you ever wake up with them bullfrogs on your mind? What’s on your mind?
CB: I was hoping to ask you a few questions… I’m going through a little bit of a phase right now, wondering about a rather indelicate question—frogs.
SP: Oh no, not another media interview. I’m sick and tired of you reporters. Can’t you leave us frogs alone?
CB: I just have some questions and then I’ll be on my way.
SP: Listen, anything I say is off the record. I suppose you’re going to ask me about that kissing business and frogs.
CB: No, not that. I know that’s a myth. But a pleasant one, to tell you the truth.
SP: Well, I love those stories, but as you know, they’re part of fictional bullfrog tales. A young bullfrog being kissed by a beautiful damsel. A bullfrog, always a bullfrog. He’s not going to change, that’s for sure.
CB: No, I wasn’t going to bring that up—I think it would be rude.
SP: You know, we have a long, long fictional line. Who doesn’t know The Frog Prince fairy tale, most famously told by the Brothers Grimm? Remember Frog and Toad by Arnold Lobel? What about Michigan J. Frog from Looney Tunes? Then there’s that famous American frog, Kermit the Frog. I don’t know how old and tired he is now. I have no idea what he’s up to anymore. Anyway, young man, spit it out so I can finish my breakfast.
CB: I really want to ask you about this thing—about frogs in boiling water. I know it’s an indelicate subject. I shouldn’t be asking you, but I’m just so curious. I want to know.
SP: I thought you’d bring that up. A lot of people have been asking about that ever since some silly fool in this country brought it up as a metaphor for human behavior. Well, here’s the truth: that old myth? It started with some German fellow—Friedrich Goltz, I think—back in the 1800s. He did some grim experiments on frogs, and ever since, people keep repeating the nonsense that we’ll just sit there while the water slowly boils. Rubbish. We may be ectothermic, but we’re not stupid. If the water gets too warm, we feel it and we jump out. It’s basic survival. Modern biologists have debunked that story ages ago, but you humans love your dramatic metaphors.
CB: Thanks for the explanation. It’s cleared up a lot for me. I wish you a very good day. But please—can I put your remarks on record?
SP: OK, buddy, but spell my name correctly. I suppose people must know the truth. That’s my final word on the subject. We frogs aren’t like humans. We are not stupid. Please, please don’t be a clod and post this stuff on social media—especially not TikTok. Next time, let’s talk about how frogs are being wiped out everywhere. I’m not just talking about the way they treat frogs in France. Far too many croak because Frenchmen and French ladies stuff us into their mouths. But that’s another story for another day.
