Happiness. It’s that elusive state of being we’re all chasing, but who’s actually catching it? Is it the married couples enjoying Sunday braais and shared grocery bills? The single women sipping cocktails while their married friends wrangle toddlers? Or the single guys … well, what are they doing exactly?
Let’s start with some research-based claims. Studies suggest married folks tend to be the happiest. According to the 2024 World Happiness Report, South Africa is ranked 87th globally for happiness, and marital status appears to play a role. Married individuals, particularly women, reportedly experience higher life satisfaction than their single peers. But don’t despair, single ladies — you’re doing just fine. In fact, widowed and divorced women often report surprising levels of contentment.
And then there’s single men. Research paints a less rosy picture for them, implying they’re languishing in the unhappiness zone. But is that true? And if so, why? Let’s unpack this.
The Married People’s Club: Smiling Through Shared Load-Shedding
Marriage seems to come with perks: companionship, emotional support, and a built-in excuse to skip awkward social events. Married men reportedly experience higher levels of happiness than their single counterparts, possibly because marriage provides structure, stability, and someone to nag them about visiting the doctor.
For women, marriage often boosts happiness — provided it’s a good marriage. (Bad marriages, as anyone who’s seen a soap opera knows, do the opposite.) A supportive spouse can help navigate life’s challenges, and let’s not underestimate the joy of delegating half the household chores.
Single Women: Thriving, Not Just Surviving
Single women, especially those who’ve been married and come out the other side, often report being quite content. Why? Independence, freedom, and a lack of anyone asking, “What’s for dinner?” seem to top the list.
Widows and divorcees frequently discover a second wind of happiness, pursuing hobbies, friendships, and careers without the pressure to maintain a relationship. It’s not that they’re anti-marriage — they’re just pro-doing-whatever-they-want.
Single Men: Are They Really So Miserable?
Now, onto the so-called sad sacks of society: single men. Studies suggest they’re less happy than their female counterparts and their married brethren. But why?
1. Social Isolation: Single men might lack the strong social networks that married people or single women often cultivate.
2. Health Neglect: Without a partner to remind them to eat vegetables or get a checkup, some single men slide into unhealthy habits.
3. Stigma: Societal expectations still put pressure on men to marry, leaving some to feel like they’ve failed if they don’t.
But let’s be real: not all single men are unhappy. Many are thriving, enjoying their independence and avoiding relationship drama. Could it be that the “unhappy single man” trope is outdated?
Can Single Men Be Happy Without a Partner?
Absolutely. Happiness isn’t about relationship status; it’s about mindset. Here’s what single men (or anyone) can do to boost their happiness:
• Build a Community: Strong friendships and support networks are key to well-being.
• Stay Healthy: Exercise, eat well, and don’t skip those medical checkups.
• Find Purpose: Whether it’s a career, a hobby, or a cause, having a sense of purpose can transform your outlook.
• Embrace the Freedom: Enjoy the perks of single life — no in-laws, no shared Netflix account drama, and no one hogging the blanket.
So, Who’s the Happiest?
The truth is, happiness is subjective. Married couples might have their date nights and shared mortgages, but single women are thriving in their independence, and many single men are living their best lives too.
If you’re single, married, or somewhere in between, remember: the key to happiness isn’t your relationship status. It’s finding joy in the life you have — and maybe eating a few more vegetables.
